Pressing Pause

So, I'm not pregnant after our second try.  Which is... ok.  Because when I got antibiotics for the UTI, they weighed me.

O    M    G

My exact face when I saw what the nurse wrote down.

OMGOMGOMGOMG.
I can't even write the number.  I haven't told Hubs other than crying and declaring that I'm fat (he's wonderful and swears i'm not).

My Reactions

I used to keep a weight loss blog and I can't even fathom this - or how it got this bad.  To give a hint, if I had been pregnant, I would have been at risk for gestational diabetes.  As it is, the extra weight might have been affecting my fertility.  So, while it worries me that we didn't get pregnant already, I am kind of relieved that I'm not going to be the HUGE pregnant lady.

The day of the weigh-in, Hubs and I talked and decided that we are putting the baby-making on pause for December.  That will give us time to either get ready to move or decide to stay in our current place, be able to drink during the holidays, and, most importantly, lose weight.  I'm not expecting a 50 lb drop in one month, but I would like to get rid of about 15-20 lbs before we start the process again.

In other news, here are some random things:

• Ryan now has interviews at 7 different programs - Tampa, Miami, Gainesville FL, Seattle, SLC, Minnesota and New Jersey.
• I'm about to get crazy busy coordinating my coworker's wedding - so excited!
• We may have found a new place to live in Orlando (with a pool!)
• From tracking my ovulation we're starting to think I have a lazy ovary.  I've had weird/no readings on the monitor every other month since I started tracking my ovulation.  With the plan to skip December, that would have us trying in January on "wonky ovary" month - if they go back and forth.  So who knows when this will actually happen!

We'll see where this month takes us!

Take 2

It's that time again! (I think) I ovulated! I've been getting confusing readings on the fertility monitor.  I've had a "high" reading since last Saturday, but no peak days yet.  Of course, my cursory search of the internet shows plenty of women that had the same thing and got pregnant that month - it might just be missing the hormone.  Or I might not be ovulating... Either way, the last week was lots of fun!

Also, in this edition of Where Will We Be Raising This Baby, Ryan now has 5 interviews for a fellowship position:

Miami

Tampa

New Jersey

Salt Lake City

Rochester, MN

The holidays are coming up, which has all kinds of implications. I have a bachelorette party the Saturday after Thanksgiving that I won't get to drink at, but the bride knows. A few select people know that I'm not drinking, but it's going to be hard to hide from our families. I'm supposed to cook mac and cheese and cookies for Thanksgiving - I can only hope I won't be nauseous. Speaking of the carb-fest that is Thanksgiving, I really, really want to be the cute preggo that doesn't look knocked up from behind, but if I get pregnant now, that is SO not going to happen. I'm trying to watch what I eat and get exercise, but with the holidays and it getting dark before I'm home from work, it's tough. 

Updates in Ovulation and Places to Live

So, I didn't ovulate last month.

At least that's what the fertility monitor says.  And, I didn't experience any symptoms that would lead me to think that I did, so boo.  Obviously it's way, WAY too early to freak out over this.  But still.  Not real happy about it.  We were in San Francisco at a conference when the monitor quit asking me to pee on sticks.  I came back to bed and cried while Ryan told me that it was ok, and that the monitor just didn't like me :)

I did find out that I have a 22 day cycle, which is shorter than most.  So I probably ovulate around day 6-10.  If the monitor doesn't have me peeing on sticks by day 6 (in just a few days), I'm jumping hubs no matter what.  He certainly won't mind, and at least I'll know that I tried!


We also have an updated list of possible places to live.  Since applying to 10 places is the same price as the 7 or so that he actually wants to go to (yes, we have to pay to apply, pay to go there, and pay for the exams he'll need to take before. Awesome.), there are 10 possibilities now:

 

 

In order of my preference:

1. Tampa, FL
2. Gainesville, FL
3. Nashville, TN
4. Chicago, IL
5. Miami, FL
6. Rochester, MN
7. Salt Lake City, UT
8. New Brunswick, NJ
9. New York, NY
10. Boston, MA

I don't think Hubs has a clear choice right now - he's just concentrating on where ever will let him in.  I'm sure he'll have his pick; he's a smart one!


Finally, I think I have gotten it through my head that I'm far too overweight to contemplate being pregnant right now.  At least, I know I am so out of shape that I would never survive labor at the moment.  So diet and exercise start right now.  Even though PMS tiredness just about killed me last week, and I did nothing but go home and sleep after work, I'm turning over a new leaf this week. I am eating better (no more excuses!) and the only way I am going to catch up on TV is if I am on my stationary bike.  I want to be a cute preggo, not mistaken for just being fat!

Acne and Where Will We Be Raising This Child?

The going-off-birth-control saga continues, now with teenage acne!  I've always had "troubled" skin, which turned into sensitive, combination, adult acne skin, but in the last year, I've felt like I've solved it with Obagi Clenziderm.  My skin was looking pretty good at one point!  Then I gave the Nuva Ring the boot and this happened:



SOURCE

Another side effect I was warned about via the Internet, but geez! Is it ever worse than I thought!  My skin hasn't produced this much oil in 15 years!  It's slowly starting to dissipate, the oiliness is getting much better, but I still look pox-marked. :(

Ryan and I are looking for houses here in Orlando - to rent, since right now, we only can count on being here for another 1.5+ more years - and haven't found much yet.  Since he is still rotating in Tampa, the house hunt hasn't gone full force yet.

What is starting to ramp up is Ryan interviewing for fellowship positions.  He's decided to go into Musculoskeletal Oncology (which is what he is rotating though in Tampa right now), so now I get to play the "Where Will We Be Raising This Child? (for at least one year) Game."  The possibilities (in red) and more distant possibilities (in light blue) are below:

 

 



The list (in order of my preference of places to live) includes:

1. Tampa, FL
2. Gainesville, FL
3. Nashville, TN
4. Chicago, IL
5. Miami, FL
6. New York, NY
7. Boston, MA

Other possibilities include Toronto and Rochester, MN, but I don't know how really possible they are.  Luckily fellowship last for only 1 year (for the most part; some programs are 2), and I figure I can tough it out anywhere for a year.  I'd just like to be some place where our family is relatively close if there is a kid involved.


It's getting close to a month of off-birth-control; my iPhone calendar has a reminder to take out my Nuva ring this Thursday.  My next post might have something to do with the fertility monitor!!!